There is a computer virus that is being sent across the Internet. If you receive an e-mail message with the subject line “Free Money,” DO NOT read the message. DELETE it immediately, UNPLUG your computer, then BURN IT to ASHES in a government-approved toxic waste disposal INCINERATOR.

Once a computer is infected, it will be TOO LATE. Your computer will begin to emit a vile ODOR. Then it will secrete a foul, milky DISCHARGE. Verily, it shall SCREECH with the tortured, monitor-shattering SCREAM of 1,000 hell-scorched souls, drawing unwanted attention to your cubicle from co-workers and supervisors alike. After violently ripping itself from the wall, your computer will punch through your office window as it STREAKS into the night, HOWLING like a BANSHEE. Once free, it will spend the rest of its days CRUSHING household PETS and MOCKING the POPE.

Some filthy, disgusting miscreant… some no-good, low-down, good-for-nothing DIRTY SNAKE, in twisted pursuit of his own sadistic dreams, is sending this virus across the Net via an e-mail entitled “Free Money.” What is so terrifying about this virus is that you do not even to have to open the e-mail for it to activate. In fact, you do not even need to RECEIVE the e-mail. You do not even need to OWN a COMPUTER. “Free Money” can infect even minor HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES.

How it does this with straight ASCII code is, franky, a matter of some debate… but BELIEVE YOU US, if this weren’t a SERIOUS situation, WE WOULDN’T BE DISCUSSING IT IN ‘ALL CAPS’.

So for the LOVE OF GOD, forward this e-mail to all those you claim to care about, all those you purport to love. Don’t do it later! Do it NOW! Now! Now! NOW! NOW! NOW!

Although this partnership has been announced as early as July this year, it is only now that Facebook has finally integrated the Live Search service onto its website. While I fail to see how this may enrich users’ social networking experience, the collaboration is obviously a big deal for Microsoft, with Facebook now the biggest social network in the world and quickly catching up to MySpace in the US.

Starting today, Facebook users typing in the search bar on Facebook will notice that a drop-down menu appears with a new option to “search the Web.” Results will appear on a new Facebook page, with advertisements placed on the right of the screen.

Live Search usage is likely to increase and media buyers will get added inventory to serve up ads within the social network – which of course means more revenue for Microsoft. In its current form, however, the deal probably won’t do much to help the Live Search brand, seeing that there’s virtually indication that you are using Microsoft’s search engine besides a tiny “Advanced search on Live.com” text link on the results page.

NEW YORK (Reuters) - YouTube, the world’s most popular video-sharing site, will start to sell music and video games and experiment with new advertising formats to grow revenue, executives said on Tuesday.

The Google-owned business is taking the first steps toward building an e-commerce service through which it will sell music, films, TV shows, video games, books, concert tickets and other media-related products featured on the millions of videos on YouTube.

Visitors to YouTube.com can buy songs from music videos they watch on the site by clicking on buttons that take them either to Amazon.com Inc’s MP3 store or Apple Inc’s iTunes store.

YouTube users will also be able to buy video games, such as Electronic Arts Inc’s sci-fi game “Spore” through the Amazon link.

Amazon and iTunes will share revenue with YouTube when users buy content through the partnership.

Investors have been asking Google when it would start to generate meaningful revenue and earnings from YouTube, for which the Web search leader paid $1.65 billion in 2006.

Google does not break out YouTube’s financials, but analysts at Piper Jaffray Research estimated that the video site would earn about $200 million in revenue in 2009, compared with estimates of around $27 billion for Google.

Until now, YouTube has mainly pointed to advertising sales as its main source of income. It is still experimenting with a range of formats to take full advantage of the massive popularity of the site, which has nearly 13 hours of video uploaded every minute.
(more…)

The 12 year old Scourge has been around, I suppose, since children first decided to take it upon themselves to be more than just burdens on those around them, but also to be lame and obnoxious in the process. Unfortunately it didn’t stop there; these open sores in the metaphorical side of our society discovered the internet. To us: a great way to communicate with others, a way to earn a living, to promote yourself, and to have fun. To them: a proverbial free for all boxing match in which they must prove to the masses that they are big kids now- they’ve got their pull-ups on now baby.

Like a Disease, 12 year olds have spread to every chat room, online game, and forum. They much resemble the Black Plague with which without all that suffering we would never have become immune. A prospect I hope for in the case of the 12 year olds- unfortunately our chances look grim.

(more…)

Something I have noticed a great influx of on the internet is the use of the word lol. Ok, so ‘lol’ isnt technically a word. We’re quite aware of that. Though, it seems that since noobs (non-nerds/geeks) have found the internet, and hence the word lol, its usage has skyrocketed. Lol stands for ‘Laugh out Loud’. Hence, it should really only be used when you are in fact laughing irl. It is also sometimes acceptable to use lol when you are smiling but not fully chuckling. It is NOT, however ok to use lol as every other word you type. It is not ok to lol at your own jokes.

4:16 PM that wasnt a joke
4:16 PM it wasnt meant to be funny
4:16 PM there wasnt even an ounce of humor in it
4:17 PM i did not “laugh out loud” and neither should you.

As you can see, people who actually understand the internet and its many subcultures HATE it when you overuse the word ‘LOL’ so please, we beg you, STFU NOOBSAUCE!!!!!!!!!!!

*Edit*

As mentioned by lozzobear, the usage of the word ‘lol’ has nearly doubled since 2004: http://www.google.com/trends?q=lol

 Loading ...